Things I love these days

1. The way Owen smiles at the fishies on his crib bumper when I go in his room to get him up. I swear the kid thinks my voice is coming from those fishies.

2. The cozy time that we all three have in the mornings. It's not every morning so I cherish the times we have them.

3. The times when I am not being the most attentive mom while feeding Owen and he suddenly stops eating his bottle and I find that it's because he is smiling up at me with dreamy eyes. Ahhhhh it melts my heart.

4. When Joe is feeding our sweet boy, and Owen so sweetly puts his hand on his daddy's and keeps it there.

5. The way that sometimes I am the only person Owen wants to calm him when he is having a melt down-which is so very rare.

6. The sweet moments we have rocking in his room and singing "Baby Mine" from Dumbo.

7. When I am downstairs cooking or just getting some special mommy sleep in time and I can hear the sweet words that Joe speaks to Owen over the baby monitor.

8. The sweet coos and almost giggles that come from my little boys mouth. Precious!

9. The way Owen rubs my back when his little arm is there.

10. The wonderful moments Joe and I have when sneaking into Owen's room when he's fast asleep. We love watching him sleep and praying over him. It's fun to admire something you made and to give your God thanks for that tiny miracle!

The boy LOVES his thumb!

This is what Joe and I hear on the monitor everyday when Owen goes down for naps or bedtime. He gets especially loud at the end of the clip. (This is mainly for Grandma as she is dying to see him!)

Baby Dedication at Cumberland

This past Sunday Joe and I had the wonderful opportunity to dedicate Owen. We promised that we would raise him in the church and teach him Christian values. The church also promised to come along side of us and help us and hold us accountable to those promises. I like the way Todd, the kids minister, put it. That raising kids takes a village. This is sooooo important to Joe and I since we are so far from our family's. We love the church family we have at Cumberland and know that we can count on them for anything...even a date night or two.

The "D" word...

First, let me start off saying this is me being real and really letting you in on what life has been like for me the last two months.

I have been diagnosed with postpartum depression. I have sought treatment and have been put on medication to help my hormones even out. It has been a rocky road since I had Owen, now don't get me wrong, I love him and love that I have him and wouldn't trade him for ANYTHING. It's just my hormones went way wacky when having him. There were days when taking care of my sweet boy was the last thing I wanted to do. Getting out of bed was a challenge-I felt like I could sleep all day long. And poor Joe...one day I would be hysterically crying, then the next I would be incrediably evil, then the next so apathetic it was ridiculous! This was begining to be a cycle I was saw developing as the weeks went on so I knew something wasn't right. I went to the doctor and talked with her about some of my symptoms and how I was feeling and she diagnosed me with postpartum. What stumps me is after I went to the doctor and started telling people what I was going through, friends started coming out of the wood work sharing how they went through the same thing. I wanted to scream "WHY DIDN'T YOU SHARE WITH ME EARLIER!" Why is something so hard always kept a big ugly secret? Is it because it has the word depression attached to it and society tells us that we all have to live in perfect little bubble and depression doesn't fit in that bubble? Even sadder I think being a Christian the church often tells people they are not allowed to go through something like this because we all think that God wouldn't allow us to go through something like this. Which I have to confess I have had some of those thoughts. My pregnancy was awesome-so easy! I was on track to have my perfect little family and live my perfect little life. When I had Owen I think I had unrealistic expectations of what being a mom was. No one can ever prepare you on how hard being a new mommy can be! No one can make you understand that that sweet little one depends on you 24/7. Even when daddy is helping, you are still on mommy mode. I know a lot of women can adjust to this and adjust great, but I had a hard time with it. Most of all I kept thinking that I just had a baby that this should be the most wonderful time of my life! I didn't have an awful childhood, I didn't have any life tradgeties that should be sending me over the edge. Then one night when expressing that same thought to my wonderful small group, they helped me realize that yes, I didn't have any of those horrible things happen to me, but chemically in my brain I was off a little, and it was something I had no control over. It was then that I gave my depression to God and asked him to help me get through it with His power and healing. Slowly the days got better and with the help of my medicine, prayer and lots of people checking in on me I am getting through this ugly phase. I am enjoying my time with my baby more and more and he is such a blessing. Joe has been awesome with dealing with me, I'm sure it hasn't been fun for him either. The only thing I can gather from this is that God is preparing me so I may help someone else who goes through this condition as well. I know it won't be a forever thing and that having a baby is a huge life altering thing that can be hard for some people and chemically things go not as planned.

So, this is part of the reason I have not blogged lately. The other part is not enough hours in my days. But I hope to be better about it again and keep family and friends up to date on me, Joe and and Owen.

We LOVE The Speelman Family!

OK, so I'm late on this post, but I'm just now feeling I'm in a place to catch up on my blog and everything else in my life (more details on that whole subject to come...hopefully soon)

Joe's sister Liz and her family came to visit us from Louisville, KY a few weekends back. It was the kids spring break so they all piled in the car and made the 7 hour drive down to Atlanta to see us...well to see Owen really! =) Liz and Skip have two boys Jake (14) and Ben (12) and we all have so much fun when we are together! Liz just loved her new nephew and the boys just thought their newest cousin was so fun. We did the usual with The Speelman's...ate, watched movies, went out to dinner, and ate some more! It's just nice to have family that you know you can just completely do nothing with and still laugh and have a good time together. Plus their kids are so good and are fun to be around! I love My sister in law, she is the sweetest person and has welcomed and loved me since day one. We hope that we can continue to make the drives to see one another in the future so we can get to know their boys even more, and so they can get to know our's as he grows!

2 month check up, and going to the Nursery!

Owen had his 2 month check up today...I can't believe it 2 months!! Where does the time go?? He is getting so big, and and becoming even sweeter, which I didn't think was possible. He is cooing, and squeeling when he gets excited and smiling more and more. He is doing better at lifting his head, although I think we do need to work more on his tummy time during the day. His little personality is is blooming and it's so fun to see the little boy he is developing to be.

He is now weighing in at 11 pounds 7 ounces and he is 24 1/4 inches long! We are going to bumping up his ounces of formula from 4 ounces to 6 ounces per feeding. The little piggy is starting to act hungry after eating his normal 4 ounces. So we will see if he can finish a full 6 ounce bottle. The doctor says Owen has a bit of eczema on his face, chin and chest. So I have to rub Aquaphor cream on him throughout the day to help with it. His neck is doing better as far as him looking and sleeping more on his left side. But the doctor still wants him to go to physical therapy to help it even more. We have also been taking him to the Chiropractor to have his neck adjusted and it has helped him a ton. After the first appointment I found him sleeping on his left side-something he had never done before. Since then I have found him a hand full of times sleeping on that side. So between his adjustments and physical therapy hopefully he will be making tons more progress in the next few weeks.

One more thing to report...Owen went to the Nursery at church yesterday! I think I was more excited to take him then any other mom ever has been! He did so great! He finished his bottle and just cuddled with Miss Shannon and Mr. Mark. when I went to pick him up he was sleeping sound in the crib...PERFECT! Sunday's are hard for us and I was happy he got in his morning nap. It felt so good to be able to go into service and worship with my husband and not have to worry if Owen was going to cry, or if I had to leave to change a diaper ect. I feel so blessed to be apart of a church that has people I can trust and who love my boy! So thank you Shannon and Mark for making that transition so smooth!

Heres are a few new pics of my little man:

He loves his Mama!

Here is Owen "flirting" with Mommy...

Look who's smiling!

I'm happy to report that Owen is now smiling-he is no longer a blob! He has the sweetest little (well it's not little it is really big and lights up his whole face) smile. This picture is not the best, but it was the only one we could capture with the camera because of the delay and because he does it so quick. Hopefully I can get a few more pictures in the next week to show how big he really can smile and his sweet dimples. I'm so happy to be moving into this stage; I love to see his little personality forming.

This picture was taken while my Aunt Leslie and Uncle James were in town this past weekend. Owen just LOVED when Uncle James would talk to him. He would just smile and smile. We had a wonderful visit with them. It was short, but sweet. Aunt Leslie was a great help with Owen and things around the house and I appreciated her coming out to see us. We are very blessed by great family. Now we are preparing for Joe's sister and her family to come in town this weekend. We love Liz, Skip, Jake and Ben and can't wait to introduce them to our boy!